lessons from high school

After reading my brother's brain dump on investment banking recruiting, I’ve always wanted to make a post like this. High school was similar to this, at least for me. I’m sure I’ll look back on this post in 4 years and think that high school was never that serious, but right now it’s a pretty big deal. This is part of my exploration into writing longer and longer pieces, and I really wanted to get this out before beach week.

Due to a combination of factors: pressure from parents and culture, the competitive nature of my school, the desire to be the best person I could be, and the desire to create a good financial foundation, I grinded during high school and probably will do the same in college. From incredible emphasis on standardized tests, GPA, activities, and more, I took a different path. Looking back, I definitely could have been more relaxed with everything, but I felt like I didn’t have the privilege to, coming from immigrant parents who sacrificed everything for my future. Ultimately, I wanted to get into the best college for my future.

The point of this blog post is to reflect at least partially on these last four years and provide advice for all my underclassmen friends who are just starting their journey. I’ve grown so much these last four years, made many mistakes, and had a lot of fun.

Background

Since elementary school, I have always had pressure from my parents to get straight As in school. In high school, such expectation became my own. All my friends had 4.0s, and the MCPS A-B policy did help a lot. However, I made it my personal goal to get all quarter A’s throughout high school. Although this goal placed a lot of stress on me when I bombed a stat test and forgot multi-variable calculus and English homework, this pressure pushed me to succeed. Diamonds are formed under pressure.

With both college apps and a desire to push myself to my limits, I took the hardest courses I thought I could take. I was in the Global Ecology program that involved taking a certain pathway of courses and going on field trips twice a month. I was extremely lucky that there was also a humanities and science, math, and computer science program at my school because it allowed me to take advanced-level courses in fields I was interested in.

I wouldn’t encourage or discourage anyone to take a similar course load. You know yourself the best and what you can handle, but I would decide for yourself if a class is difficult or not.

My family prioritized my academics first, so I got tutoring for my standardized tests and college applications. On the days I had tutoring, I woke up at 6:30 AM for school—sometimes at 4:15 AM if I had morning practice—swam again in the afternoon, drove to Bethesda, had Chipotle, went through a 2-hour tutoring session, arrived at home at 10:00, and did any homework I didn’t finish at school. During my ACT prep season, I grinded out around 18 full practice exams. I did the same for all my AP exams.

Outside of the classroom, I swam competitively for the past 11 years, training around 17 hours a week and averaging around 20 hours a week on swimming with fluctuations due to meets, high school season, and other swimming-related commitments. I’m sure I could have focused more energy on the other aspects of my life if I hadn’t been doing swimming, but I’m happy I stuck with it. It has taught me discipline, community, leadership, and so much more.

Inspired by the enthusiasm of previous team members, I became the captain of the swim team and also volunteered as a junior coach for my summer team earlier in my high school career. People are probably tired of me saying this, but buying into the team culture is so important and having this family-like team is so warming and fun.

Inspired by my brother, I participated in DECA all four years, joining the leadership team and winning states in sophomore year and becoming a chapter leader in junior year. In sophomore year, I also interviewed and volunteered as a developer for HCB by Hack Club, a financial management software. In my junior year, I was whole school historian and ran pep rallies, and in senior year, I was senior class vice president and vice president of the National Honor Society. I’ll be introducing the staff speaker at graduation! I’ve had so much fun and learned so much from these various experiences even though they didn’t necessarily contribute to my “spike”.

I also started a club in my freshman year that ran hackathons. We started with a virtual hackathon with 73 participants and eventually ran in-person hackathons with 116 total attendees across 3 events. In total, we raised around $6,400, almost all from cold emailing. While on paper we had numerous successes, we faced a lot of conflict internally. There was club politics, arguments over event dates, and work distribution. However, all was necessary in making me a better communicator and leader.

After taking a free intro to quantum computing course my computer science teacher introduced me to, I interviewed for a partnered internship program at the University of Maryland, Baltimore County in the field of quantum photonics. Only after I followed up with the interviewer was I accepted into the program. After that first experience, I spent a large part of my junior year cold-emailing professors at the University of Maryland, College Park, and interned there the following summer. Looking for internships and opportunities showed me that the best, most formative experiences are just randomly dropped into your life. Make sure you take advantage of them! Also, I’m like pretty sure that I only got my second internship because my professor knew my other professor, so these experiences do build up and lead to others.

After attending regular art classes, I won 2nd place and 3rd place at the Federal Junior Duck Stamp Art Contest. I think being somewhat well-rounded is important as it gives you different perspectives.

I tried my hand at recruiting for swimming. I knew it was a long shot since I didn’t focus 100% on swimming, but I reached out to multiple D3 coaches and got many responses. I realized that my only chance of getting into these hyper-selective schools was swimming, but unfortunately, I wasn’t fast enough for the schools I was looking at. I had a better chance to get in academically.

At the end of my college application process, I was fortunate enough to get accepted into Purdue, Georgia Tech, UIUC, UCLA, UTAustin Electrical and Computer Engineering and Business Honors Program, UMD Full Ride, and CMU. I will be attending Carnegie Mellon University for Electrical and Computer Engineering. I am happy about my results, and all glory to God.

If you want my full stats, feel free to DM me

Advice for college and life?

It’s not that serious/Don’t take everything seriously

If you could only take away one piece of advice, in both LIFE and in applying to college, it is this: don’t take it seriously. This piece of advice is what allows me to remain positive almost all the time. It’s easy to get caught up in competition and jealousy. You don’t have to win every competition, have every leadership position, and more. Cheer your friends on, no matter if you are on the sidelines or in the race. He/she will buy you a beer one day. We’re all on our own journey. Remember that this entire process, high school, applying to college, etc. is just one part of your life. Don’t make it your entire personality. Sure, the college you go to has an impact on the rest of your life, but so do the connections you make with your peers, your teachers, strangers, and more.

Be Kind

This is more personal, but when I was younger (elementary school/middle school), I was never cool. I had friends, but I would never be the first pick in sports. To this day, I'm not the first pick in sports (but lowkey it’s because I’m bad at them), but I will never forget the moments when someone would invite me to join their team in basketball or make an effort to include me in their conversations. I’ve made an effort to be that person.

A lot of my friends are surprised that I’m chill with a lot of people in this area. Although mostly because I’ve lived here my entire life, (in my opinion), I think it’s because I made conscious efforts to introduce myself to others and be as nice as I can.

During the last week of high school, I filled up my yearbook with extra pages and my senior shirt. Although I definitely got more signatures than I gave out, my yearbook is proof that I value other people, no matter if they value me in return. So, be kind no matter if others are kind to you. Invite the person in the corner. Speak up if you see or hear something wrong. And finally, you have no ops.

High school and the college application process are a chance for you to explore your identity

At the beginning of my freshman year, people called me crazy for joining 10 different clubs and giving up most of my lunch periods to attend meetings. Halfway through freshman year, I dropped more than half of them. Don’t be afraid to branch out and try something new. In fact, I’d encourage you to do so.

The college essay writing process itself is amazing. START EARLY AND DON'T PROCRASTINATE. You’ll learn so much about yourself, and although it is such a pain, you’ll come out better than you went in.

Be decent at everything

Take that extra hour (or maybe multiple hours) to learn how to code, design graphics, edit videos, draw, and take photos.

Create a spreadsheet to organize your college-related stuff before senior year and update it as you go.

Make genuine connections with your teachers (or at least respect them)

One of the private blog posts I wrote in my freshman year was about advice for middle school students. While I cringe reading my work in the past, and will most likely cringe while reading this post in the future, past me made some good points. Your teachers do control your grades, no matter how clear the rubric is. They can give leeway sometimes. While this goes for everyone, don’t talk shit about your teachers. They’re humans, and it’s their first time living, too. Being kind extends to your teachers. Also, make an effort to make genuine connections with your teachers. Thank them, talk to them about your plans, ask them for advice, and talk about stuff from outside of school. While this will certainly help when you need a recommendation for internships or applying to college, this will make high school more enjoyable and could subconsciously help your grades.

Another point I made in my middle school blog post was to ask questions. IMO, this was the reason why I had high grades. It kept me engaged and cemented my understanding.

If you want to get into a highly selective college

So this is more of an applying to college-specific piece of advice, but it can be applied elsewhere. If you truly want to get into a highly selective college, you need to find your unique value proposition. In my opinion, it really comes down to this. What do you offer that no one else does? For some, it might be athletics (I think this is the way to go), it might be academics (math competitions, etc.), it might be research, it might be activism, it might be something completely niche. It’s different for everyone. You don’t need to do everything. IMO, I could have dropped half of my activities and reached a similar result. Find what you love and do it really really well.

You need to craft a story. If you’re in Global, you already have something interesting: a passion for the environment. I’d go all in on that if you’re passionate about it.

It doesn’t really matter (unless you’re in finance)

Looking around, I’ve come to the conclusion that it doesn’t really matter what school you go to. People at state schools graduate and start working for OpenAI and Google. I think the biggest resource that more selective schools give is are alumni network, a higher placement rate, and a community of people who are similarly driven, but you still have to work hard no matter what. But in the end, even if you’re in finance, a lesson from Hamlet, it doesn’t matter.

The people you surround yourself with matter

You are the average of your 5 closest friends - Someone probably

The people you hang around with determine how you will act. Make sure you hang around people who actually care about you and your problems. Make sure you hang around people who have the same goals as you.

Fake it till you make it

My source being living life, I’ve come to see that extroverts have a better time in life. I was always pretty loud and talkative. But, I wouldn’t really call myself an extrovert. I get nervous before talking to people, sound awkward when I decide to introduce myself to someone new, and have many insecurities. I’m scared of hanging out with people one-on-one, and I’m used to getting ignored. I get nervous when I ask to join a pickup basketball game. Although I’ve gotten a lot better, I get nervous when interacting with strangers.

Yet, I make an effort to introduce myself to someone new and remember their name, participate in class, make small talk, share my vulnerabilities, and make genuine connections. I know that ultimately, getting good at social interactions comes with practice.

In my freshman year, I was amazed with how almost every single upperclassmen could give a complex presentation without losing their train of thought and stuttering. I thought this was something that came with getting older, but looking back, my extroversion developed from many, many little steps, each seeminingly like a huge mountain I had to scale.

Have fun

I kinda mentioned this in my previous post, but I kinda wish I went out more. After graduating high school (although I haven’t officially graduated), you don’t remember the countless hours you spent studying for AP Physics (although that is important). You remember the times you went camping with your friends, the global overnights, going ice skating and to the mall multiple times with your not-so-close-but-will-be-close friends in freshman year, the lunch you ate with one of your closest friends over the summer, that time you went to crumbl with two of your closest friends, that time you ran a mile on the ocean city board walk, that time you had to drive your friend home in the middle of a night from a party after a big swim meet because he wears night contacts, that time you went hiking to great falls, going to brusters after playing golf, that time you went to the movies with your brother and your dad, those times you ran errands with your mom, that time you decided to hang out with your friend from middle school for the first time in 5 years, that time you went to black lion cafe with your two friends to study although you guys didn’t really study that much, that time you went to the LPGA with your family, that time you traveled to San Francisco alone for a hackathon, that time you visited your brother in Austin for spring break and experiened the full college experience, that time you used the dance that we learned in us history in the mosh pit at homecoming, that time you slept on the ground in the UMD stadium with a bunch of strangers for a hackathon, that time you went to a ropes course with your swim team, that time you went to prom with your friends and later with that other girl, that time you and your ap stat class had a breakfast party, that time you had a pasta dinner with your high school swim team, and that time you went to school at 7 pm to see the sunset one last time with your entire class.

So, say yes. Don’t be like me, who only consistently started saying yes during grad party season. Do it for the plot.

Credits:

- God for all opportunities, the ability to take advantage of these opportunities, and everything else

- My parents for their love and sacrifice

- My brother Joshua Hou for being an inspiration

- James Xu for being a great mentor and supporting me throughout my journey

- Jasmine Li for answering hundreds of questions from me and sharing her journey

- My extended family for their continued support

- RMSC NTG and Poolesville Swim and Dive team for teaching me community, leadership, and helping me love swimming

- Ms. Bailey, Mr. Leong, Ms. Blair, and Ms. Nagy for supporting my endeavors and my growth as a person

- Ms. Speirs for giving me great advice, supporting my growth as a writer, writing my rec letter, and more

- Ms. Lao for being kind and relatable to me

- Mr. Garrison for introducing me to the greatness of physics and writing me a rec letter

- Mr. Hanson for nurturing my love of quantum

- Ms. Snavely and Mr. Foster for expanding my perspectives

- My professor for taking the chance on me

- My swim coaches for teaching me discipline and supporting me when I was down

- My friends, you know who you are, for supporting me always

- Anyone I forgot to mention